The Journal of Joe The Peacock. Yay.

4.26.2004:

11:36 PM

This is just odd.

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From: SHANNON [mailto:*omitted*]
Sent: Monday, April 26, 2004 12:05 PM
To: administrator@mentallyincontinent.com
Subject: Mentally Incontinent - A Joe The Peacock Book Feedback

Message: MY TEACHER IS AFRAID OF MIDGETS AND WE WANT HER TO CONQUER HER FEARS ON THE LAST WEEK OF SCHOOL OR SOONER. IF YOU DON'T MIND COMING TO BOWDON HIGH SCHOOL AT 504 WEST COLLEGE STREET IN BOWDON GEORGIA WHENEVER YOU ARE READY. IF THERE IS A FEE THEN PLEASE LET ME KNOW AND I AM PRETTY SURE THAT I WILL BE ABLE TO PAY THE FEE. THANK YOU!

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From: Joe The Peacock [mailto:administrator@mentallyincontinent.com]
Sent: Monday, April 26, 2004 1:35 PM
To: *omitted*
Subject: RE: Midgets?

Hi there Shannon,

I believe I'm a bit confused. Midgets?

At any rate, I certainly don't mind appearing anywhere. I'd like to know what it is that I'd be doing when I'm there, though. Can you give me some more details?

Sincerely,
Joe

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From: SHANNON [mailto:*omitted*]
Sent: Monday, April 26, 2004 4:09 PM
To: administrator@mentallyincontinent.com
Subject: Re: RE: Midgets?

Okay, my teacher, *omitted*, has the biggest fear of MIDGETS! She had a dream that when she was coming back to Bowdon from Town's County that there was a MIDGET chasing her car screaming at her and me & Another student want her to get over her fear if the price isn't that high. I am just 17 but she is my second period teacher. If the principal says its okay for you to come and approach her then hopefully you will arrive the last week of school. Just reply and tell me what the price range is. Thank you once again, Shannon

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I don't know what to do. I have no idea where Shannon A) got the idea that I am a midget, and B) I am a midget for hire. I'm no guerilla midget! I wouldn't know the first thing about being a contracting munchkin! I've never undergone training and I'm afraid there isn't a book out there called "How To Be A Midget-For-Hire."

What do I do? Do I just email back and say "Sure, pay me, i'll be there" and hope for the best? Or do I ask Shannon just how, exactly, a 6' 4" 290lb guy is supposed to help cure someone of thier fear of midgets?

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1 Comments:

Iago de Otto said...: "Or do I ask Shannon just how, exactly, a 6' 4" 290lb guy is supposed to help cure someone of thier fear of midgets?"

You could threaten to turn that person into a midget. Several bops on the noggin till s/he becomes short enough to be considered a midget. In fact, if that person actually finally did turn into a midget after all that noggin-bopping, it just could cure her/him of Lollypopguildophobia. (Yeah, that's the term, I looked it up all special like just for this posting.); 5/02/2008 2:28 AM